April Fools: Three Things You Thought You Knew About Adoption

There are some things that “everybody knows” about adoption. This “knowledge” is so well-known, of course, that facts and first-person testimonies, even the evidence of one’s own eyes, apparently aren’t effective. One couple was showing off their new baby, whom they had adopted at birth here in the U.S., at at a large family-and-friends picnic last summer. When the new parents told the story of their recent adoption, another guest asserted “Well-Known Fact Number One” confidently: “That’s impossible. There are no babies to adopt in the United States.” April Fools! The truth: In the U.S., in-country adoptions outnumbered international adoptions … Continue reading

November in the Adoption Blog: Month in Review

I began the blog on All Saints Day with a tribute to certain “Saints” in U.S. Adoption and Pioneers in International Adoption. Then I wrote a tribute to the founder of my daughter’s Korean adoption agency, who has lived an exciting and multifaceted life and is remarkable for his humble concern for children. In honor of National Adoption Month, I wrote two blogs on Top Ten Myths about Adoption. For Part One, click here. For Part Two, click here. Then I wrote a blog about events on National Adoption Day, Saturday November 17. These events included finalizations of thousands of … Continue reading

Top Ten Adoption Myths, Part Two

Continuing yesterday’s blog on the top ten myths I hear about adoption: 6. Myth: Social workers will make surprise visits to my home. Reality: Most of our homestudy took place at the agency office. There was one required—and scheduled—visit to our home. Most of our time was spent talking in the living room. The only other room the social worker asked to see was the room where we planned for the child to sleep. We did not have to have this room prepared. She only wanted to make sure there was “enough space”—and she judged that what I considered to … Continue reading

Other Kids’ Reactions to My Adopted Kids’ Skin Color

My son Patrick, who is European-American, was nearly three when his sister Meg arrived. Six months later, the two of them sat near me while I read a picture book about a Latino boy. “Hey mom,” Patrick said pointing to the picture, “that kid’s skin is different from mine.” “Yes,” I replied. “And Meg’s skin is different from mine.” “Yes,” I replied. “And mommy, your skin is different from mine.” Although this was a bit unexpected, I do have a rosy undertone (in fact I remember telling someone when I was a child that I was a pink person, not … Continue reading